A Real Wedding Budget

The perfect wedding and wedding reception are the dream of brides-to-be and their future husbands. But it seems some brides have expectations about that day that leans towards the extreme.They want the whole day to go without allowances for human error. Realistically a flawless wedding day does not exist. Why would that be an expectation?

Friends and relatives also want the wedding day to be memorable. They want the bride to have more good memories than she has film in the camera or tape in the camcorder. This hub is about realistic expectations for the bride-to-be and her future spouse. Maybe someone will benefit from this and allow themselves to relax and enjoy the moment.

First we know there is no such thing as a perfect wedding day. It does not exist now nor will it ever come to be for anyone. There are, however, precautions a bride-to-be may take that will result in a well orchestrated wedding day. Add to that the possibility that someone or something may not perform their part as well as expected. Remember one thing, if you tell yourself it will be a beautiful and successful event, it will be.

My goal is to provide suggestions that may help make your wedding and reception a beautiful and memorable experience. Lets start with the wedding budget. The one thing that can make or break a wedding and reception is the budget. You can spend a large amount of money and feel awful about that day. Or you can spend what you planned to spend and look as if you spent a million dollars on your big day.

Before opening your wallet to any of the wedding vendors, make a budget.The budget should be one that you will faithfully use as your guide for the wedding and the reception. If you plan to spend "X" amount on the wedding, spend a percentage of "X" on each segment of the wedding. Their total expense or cost to you will equal to 100 percent of "X."

Here is an example of what I mean. For discussion purposes, lets say you have $200,000 set aside for the wedding and reception. The things you will spend money on are called the segments. That would include, the reception facility;the catering; the beverages; the wedding venue, the music; the stationary; the transportation; the flowers, and etc.

At this point you have 8 segments that will take a percentage of your $200,000. Each segment is equal to 1/8th of the $200,000. One-eighth or 1/8th of $200,00 is $25,000. That means $25,000 may be spent on each segment. You could spend up to $25,000 on each segment.

• $25,000 on the wedding venue;
• $25,000 on the wedding reception facility;
• $25,00 on the transportation.
• $25,000 on the catering
• $25,000 on the beverages
• $25,000 on the wedding invitations and wedding stationary
  
• $25,000 on the wedding music
• $25,000 on wedding flowers

The total is $200,000 or 100 percent of budget for wedding and reception.

The reason you break each budget item/segment down to percentages is because the percentages act as guides. Wedding vendors will try to sell you what they have. But if you know what you want. If you know how much you can spend on the items you want, the vendors will respect you. They will work harder to please you and earn your money.

Wedding vendors are accustomed to people coming to them with unreal expectations that can't be fulfilled. They show respect for people that have thought through their wedding needs and have a plan they would like to execute. You will receive better service and feel more in control of your wedding arrangements.

So using the example above, if you wish to rent a wedding reception venue. You will know how much you can spend on the venue. That will help you make a decision regarding the many you may you may review. You will know which will fit into your budget and which may not. This also gives you the option to spend more on a reception venue and less on one of the other segments you wanted for the wedding. You will be able to make an intelligent decision and you will feel more comfortable negotiating with the owner of the reception venue.

After you've decided on the budget, decide if the bride and groom will pay 100 percent for the wedding expenses or will you accept financial help from others.

It is quite alright to accept help with the expenses of the wedding and reception. However, before allowing anyone to contribute financial resources, find out the conditions for their help. It does not matter if the individual is a parent, relative or someone the two of you deeply respect. Clearly have them state the conditions for their help. Many wedding plans have been tossed out of the window as a result of accepting financial help.

The individual financing any portion of the wedding may assume they can orchestrate the entire wedding because they contributed to the wedding. They may feel they have a right to call the shots regarding the wedding. This may seem a bit extreme but it does happen. It happens often. The control of the wedding and reception are the bride and groom's. Its your wedding.

Before accepting money from anyone, make it clear the wedding will be directed and planned according to the wishes of the wedding couple. Make it known how much,if any, input the financier of your wedding will have regarding the planning and participating in the wedding. Of course this is done with tact and courtesy towards the individual.

If you want the wedding of your dreams to come close to your expectations, leave bashfulness at the door. You must have the courage to stand up to people. Tact and courtesy are essential for future relationships especially if they are relatives or friends. You must make it clear that you accept the financial help, if you want it, but things will be managed on your terms.

You Decided not to Accept Financial Help

It is acceptable to accept financial help as a gift with no conditions attached. There are couples who decide early on they would prefer not to accept financial help from others. Today couples are better able to pay for their wedding expenses. The two may have saved up for the wedding. Or the two are financially set and can pay for their own wedding.

The budget should account for every financial detail associated with the wedding and reception. There are, however, incidentals expenses that can blow the wedding budget to bits. You won't know where the money went or how you went over budget.

Details that attack a budget include, tuxedo rental, gown alterations, hair stylist, make-up professionals ,bridal party gifts, tips, security, tips for the church music. You get the picture. Set aside money for unexpected expenses. The percentage should be a fraction of the total amount planned for the wedding.

The budget is your wedding's best friend. The budget provides a picture of how much you can spend on those segments that make the event special and filled with good memories. It is not meant to be a dark cloud of what you can or can not spend. The budget can be adjusted as needed. It gives you a picture of what you are doing. The budget allows you to intellegiently and confidently negotiate with wedding vendors. You will purchase from them the things you want and not what they have to offer.